Relationships: 4 Ways to Win the Waiting Game

"Why doesn't he call? I just can't take it anymore!" Shirley wailed. I had been Shirley's psychic advisor for almost six months, and she was normally a cheerful, well-grounded, confident woman. On this particular night, though, she was a wreck. Shirley cried for the first fifteen minutes of the call.

When I was able to get her calmed down, she told me that her boyfriend Bill hadn't called for three days following an argument. She had talked to me about Bill before, and I knew they cared about each other a great deal. They had the occasional disagreement, like all couples, but they always worked it out. Tonight, Shirley told me that this recent fight was different. The day after it, she called him twenty-three times and texted him twenty, but he didn't respond.

"That first day I was just really pissed off," Shirley told me. "The more I tried to contact him, and the more he ignored me, the angrier I got."

The next day, she tried a different approach. Shirley figured that if Bill wouldn't respond to her calls or texts, maybe she should send him an e-mail. So she did, but moments after pressing "send," she thought of something she'd forgotten to say. So she sent another one. And another. By the end of the second day, she had sent Bill eight e-mails. On the upside, she said, she only called him ten times that day and didn't text at all. Not surprisingly, he didn't respond to any of it.

By this point, Shirley's anger was being replaced by worry. There was the usual concern that something might have happened to him and he couldn't contact her. For instance, maybe he'd been so upset after their argument that he got into a car accident on the way home. But on top of that, Shirley began to think that maybe it was over for good between them. She hadn't thought their argument was a relationship-ender, but maybe he did. And if he wouldn't talk to her about it, how was she supposed to know what he was thinking? That's when she decided a call to her psychic advisor was in order.

By the third day when Shirley contacted me, she was convinced Bill would never call her again.

"It's been three days already. We never go that long without talking to each other. I know it's over!" Shirley cried.

"Shirley, three days isn't that long. There's no reason to tie yourself up in knots about this," I said soothingly as I shuffled my Tarot deck and began putting cards on the table in front of me. "I see in the cards that he'll call you soon. I psychically feel you'll receive a call from him within about ten days. But you must stop contacting him. The constant calls, texts, and emails will only keep him away longer."

"Ten days before he calls! I'll die! I'll just die!" she moaned.

I assured Shirley that she wouldn't die, but I did admit that the wait would be difficult for her. I felt that Bill had to get over the argument on his own and no amount of pushing would make it happen. Grudgingly, Shirley promised me that she would back off and give Bill some time.

Before hanging up with me that night, she said that she wished time could fast-forward ten days until Bill called. "I know I'm going to drive myself crazy just sitting around waiting for him," she complained.

"Then don't just sit around waiting for him," I advised her. "First, remember that simply because you're hoping your guy will call doesn't mean the rest of your life has to stop. Keep busy so you won't have time to obsess about what Bill is doing. Take on a new project at work, make plans with your girlfriends, clean out your garage. Just do not park yourself next to the telephone."

"All right," Shirley said slowly. "But it's hard not to think about him."

"That's the other thing you can do while you're waiting. It's fine to think about Bill, but you should do it in a way that will help draw him closer, not further away. How about if I teach you some techniques that use psychic energy to help bring the two of you back together?"

"Oh, that would be wonderful, Louise! Thank you!"

The vast majority of the calls I get in my psychic advisor practice are for love and relationship advice. Most of the callers are women seeking help with the men in their lives. I wrote my book I Saw Your Future and He's Not It: A Psychic's Guide to True Love with these women in mind. I want to help women feel empowered by understanding that they have control over the success of their romantic relationships.

My book addresses a number of common challenges that women face in their relationships, including how to find a good man, knowing when the time is right for marriage, and calling it quits when the relationship isn't working. Shirley's story about waiting for her man to call demonstrates another common complaint that I hear from my clients. I have seen successful, confident, powerful women crumble into a pile of mush as they watch the clock and wait for that phone call. Even a few weeks can seem like an eternity.

There is nothing more dis-empowering and disheartening than sitting around, day after day, waiting for the man you love to contact you. However, aggressively pursuing him can sometimes be the wrong thing to do, as Shirley's situation demonstrates. But that doesn't mean your hands are tied. There are some subtle actions a woman can take on a psychic level to nudge a man in her direction. We have the power to turn the tables, and he might end up being the one waiting for the phone to ring.

Following are four techniques I told Shirley to try in order to make waiting for Bill easier. The goal of these exercises is to help Shirley get her power back, communicate with Bill on a psychic level, and keep her hands off the phone and computer.

1. Find a picture of the man you love, preferably a close-up of his face. Try to clear your mind of everything, except the picture in front of you. Hold his picture twelve inches away from your face. With your eyes, very slowly follow the outline of his head. Start from the top of his head and don't stop until you have come full circle to the top of his head again. While you do this exercise, it's important to keep your emotions for him neutral. Now do the same with each of what I call his "heart spots." These include his eyes and mouth. Follow the outline of each, one at a time. Repeat this exercise again while holding the picture closer, about six inches from your face. As you circle his heart spots with your eyes, try to focus your mind only on those spots, one at a time. Remember to keep control of your emotions so you don't lose your focus. Do this exercise at least once a day, but twice is better.
   
   
2. You should try this one while your mind is distracted with some other activity like watching TV, listening to music, or planning your grocery list. Find a full-body photo of your man (preferably 8 x 10, but any size is okay) and lay it on a table in front of you. With your index finger, trace the outline of his body slowly. Don't focus on him, but only on tracing the outline of his body. Trace his body at least three times. Try to do this daily. This is a simple yet powerful way to communicate with him psychically.
   
   
3. For this activity you will want to be in a quiet room. Close your eyes. Visualize the face of the man you want to hear from. For a few minutes, really feel all the emotions you have for him. Feel the warm sensation of him touching you or his lips caressing yours. After a few minutes of doing this, use your index finger to write in the air what you want from him. Keep it short. For example "miss me" or "call me." What you write should not be more than four words, but two is best.
   
   
4. This last activity is the most important and you can do it all day, every day. Simply go about your daily life, confident that by engaging in these exercises you have touched him in a much deeper way than a mere phone call or text could. Believing in something gives a powerful vibration around what we want. Believe and it will be.

These activities are extremely powerful ways to communicate psychically with your man. I had one client tell me that an hour after outlining her guy's heart spots, she received a call from him. He apologized for not calling when he had promised, then told her that an hour earlier, he had felt light-headed. She went over to his house to make him chicken soup, just in case he was coming down with the flu. They reunited that evening. Of course, she knew he didn't have the flu, but she kept her little psychic secret to herself.

After I shared these psychic activities with Shirley, it took her a little time to master them.

"They sound easy enough, but it's hard not to start crying when I look at pictures of his face staring back at me," she told me one day when she was frustrated with the exercises. She had a difficult time concentrating on the heart spots without feeling emotion for Bill. I told her that's why it's so important to keep her mind neutral.

One thing Shirley noticed after practicing these techniques for five days was a growing sense that Bill could feel her. She also felt better able to control her previously uncontrollable urges to contact him. She told me that the exercises were making her feel better about herself and like she had more power in their relationship. Every day of not hearing from Bill was getting easier.

One night I received a call. The old cheerful, bubbly Shirley that I knew was back.

"Hey, Louise! Bill called me!" she announced with a giggle.

"Wonderful!" I cried. I was very happy for her.

"You told me he'd call in ten days, but it took fifteen. You were off by five days," she said teasingly.

"Well, timing can be tricky," I laughingly replied.

"You know what's strange, though? When he called, I was happy, but not as excited as I thought I'd be. It's like I knew he was going to call. If I had to wait a few days longer, it was okay because I was completely sure it would happen," she said. "Thank you, Louise."

Shirley and Bill are now planning to move in together and are talking about setting a wedding date. On the day she called to tell me they had started house hunting together, Shirley confided in me that even though she's on the phone with Bill multiple times a day, she still does Activity #3 frequently. She always writes the words "marry me" in the air. This is her little secret.