Ask people what they really want from their lives, or what's missing and they'd like more of, and the answer will always be love. We all want someone to cuddle up to and take care of us, and someone we can adore in return. A survey conducted by O Magazine and Oprah.com asked 37,000 people about their relationships, and 95% said they'd marry their true love instead of a billionaire any day of the week (and I bet the other 5% said they'd only marry the billionaire if they had feelings for him).

So, if I told you that I could help you find love and have Mr. (or Ms.) Right knocking on your door by Valentine's Day, I'm sure you'd be interested!

But what if I told you we'd be using sneaky magic to manipulate that person into falling for you, and we'd be using the power of Voodoo? Maybe you'd think again—and I know just what your problems would be:

1. You probably think Voodoo is a nasty form of black magic, and
2. Whether it is or not, you probably think it's wrong to use manipulative magic to make someone fall in love with you.

So le's put these issues behind us first.

What IS Voodoo?
Voodoo is the shamanic practice of old Africa, which was bought to the New World by slaves and now has a following of around two hundred million people worldwide. When the Africans arrived in America, they couldn't always find the herbs and other materials they'd been using in their own country to work their magic and to honor the Earth, so they learned from indigenous shamans and blended that approach with their own. Voodoo in the West is based on this blend and uses the spiritual wisdom of both traditions in spells, rituals, and secret recipes that can help you find the man or woman of your dreams. Love potions and charms for getting what you want—whether that's a lover, a job, better health, or business success—are central to its magical techniques. Given the poor circumstances of the slaves, any way of attracting good fortune was taken very seriously and many of these spells are powerfully effective.

Despite what you've seen in the films (which is where most of our negative stereotypes about Voodoo come from), these spells do not involve wild orgies, frantic blood-letting rituals, or sticking pins in dolls (a practice that is actually unheard of in Haiti, which is the country most associated with Voodoo). And, you won't be creating flesh-eating zombies who'll soon be taking over our malls! Voodoo is a religion, like any other, and if you wouldn't get this in your local Anglican church, you won't find it in Voodoo either!

Some of the earliest negative myths about Voodoo come from American troops who were stationed in Haiti just after the Second World War and wanted to make money from sensationalist books. At the base of their stories, in those unenlightened times, was racism. Some of this even crept into mainstream titles like Ian Fleming's 1954 James Bond thriller, Live and Let Die, which depicts evil Soviet agents controlling "gullible black Haitians" through their "ridiculous belief" in spirits. Racism like this is truly sad.

The truth, though, is that Voodoo works with energy, just like Wicca or shamanism, and like in those crafts, there is nothing inherently "evil" about it. What you choose to do with any magical power could be "good" or "bad," of course, but that's entirely up to you, not to the energy itself or the spirits who embody it. Which brings us to…

Okay, So Voodoo Isn't "Evil," but It Must Be Manipulative if it Makes People Fall in Love With You
My question for this one is: what, in the realm of love and attraction, isn't manipulative? Whenever we go out looking for love or meet someone on a date, do we turn up in our work clothes, unwashed, without make-up or perfume, and act like a total jerk? Or do we wear our best and sexiest outfits, showered, suited and booted, hair done nicely, wearing our most expensive perfume and make-up, and do our level best to exude charm, warmth, and sexiness throughout? If you're like 99% of people on the planet, it'll be the latter and, let's face it, that's manipulative, isn't it? Because, again, if you're like most people, the "real you" flops round her apartment in carpet slippers and jogging pants, eating Ben & Jerry's straight from the tub, with your hair all over the place. So who's kidding who here?

Every single magical practice on Earth is manipulative. That's what magic is for! Voodoo's no different from Wicca, shamanism, Kabbalism, or anything else in that respect: its purpose is to manipulate the energies of the universe so they work a little more in our favor.

That doesn't mean we shouldn't take our responsibilities seriously, though. I often get emails from people who say, "My boyfriend has left me. How do I get him back?" or, "Someone is interfering in our relationship and preventing us being together. How can I stop this and make him love me again?" My advice is always the same:

1. If the love between you is strong, it cannot be broken. There are forces in the world—human and spiritual—which can act against you, but no one and nothing can break up a relationship that is stable enough to withstand them. So think about what else has gone wrong between you without the intervention of this third person or force. Is there anything you or your lover need to change? Or something you can do in practical day-to-day terms before you think about using magic (see a counselor, talk to each other, get away on a holiday, etc)?
2. Consider the question of control. Someone or something has interfered with your relationship and exerted some form of control over you or your lover (from criticism or emotional manipulation, right through to ritual magic). If you then use magic to get your lover back or break the influence of that other person, you are also controlling your lover. Think about this and decide if you're happy to proceed on this basis.
   
   Allied to this, if your lover does come back, there will always be a part of you that will suspect they did so through magic, not because they wanted to. Are you happy to live with that knowledge?
3. If your lover returns, you will have a "duty of care" towards them. To get them back only to tire of them yourself and leave the relationship a few months later is irresponsible, leading to further pain for you both. Are you absolutely sure you want them back and can commit to a loving relationship, no matter what may be involved?
4. If your lover returns, the relationship cannot be the same as it was before. To go back into the same situation and behave in the same way is inviting the same problems. Are you prepared to change—possibly everything—in your relationship and in yourself so this doesn't happen?

If my clients are happy with their answers to these questions, then I go ahead and do the magic for them. I have to assume that people are adult and sensible enough to know their own minds, and, of course, the responsibility for the magic is theirs—as it is yours if you decide to use it.

I don't mean this in a karmic sense, and there is nothing scary implied here (I firmly believe that you have a right to be happy, and that the world will be a better place if you are!), but, practically, if you call a lover to you, then of course you will have another person's feelings and a relationship to consider. So give it some thought before you act.

If you want to go ahead, though, here are a few techniques from my book, Va-Va-Voodoo: Find Love, Make Love, & Keep Love, that I particularly like.

Divine Love
So you want to know where to find Mr Right? One Voodoo approach is divination. Here's one method from Southern Voodoo. You'll need:

• A bowl of water
• A black candle
• Some silver foil
• Paper and pen
• Seven pomegranate seeds

The water you use should be blessed in one of two ways—either because it's holy water taken from seven different churches (in each church you should leave seven silver coins to pay for it) or because it's the first spring rain of the year that you have collected for the purpose of divination, and therefore "blessed by God" and your own intention.

Strictly speaking, this divination should be done outside on the night of a full moon, but if that's difficult for you, do it wherever you can. First light your candle and place it at the head of the bowl of water so it casts a reflection there and, if you're inside, turn out the lights.

Then write down on separate pieces of paper the names of all the people you consider candidates for Mr. (or Ms.) Right. Alternatively (especially if there's no one on your love horizon at the moment), write down a few descriptions of the sort of person who interests you ("blonde with blue eyes," "dark hair, brown eyes," and so on) and where you might meet them ("work," "club," "sports hall," etc.), what they do for a living, where they live and work—anything you want information on, really!

Wrap each paper in a separate piece of foil, folding it so it looks like a small mirror, and drop it into the bowl, then cast the pomegranate seeds in on top of them and watch where they land. One seed on top of a piece of foil suggests a relationship possibility or a possible answer to your question; two means it's likely; three or more on the same slip of foil shows that a serious relationship is in the offing or that the outcome is highly likely.

Take out the foil with most seeds on it and read the name (or other information) there. If more than one piece of foil has the same number of seeds, lucky you! Now you have your pick! If no seeds fall on any slip it suggests the time's not right yet for your answers to be revealed, so leave it a month before you try again.

Making Your Lover Appear "As if by Magic"
OK, so the divination showed you who you want to attract and/or where to find them. Now here's a charm (known as a "wanga" in Haiti, or a "trick" in American Voodoo) to bring your lover to you.

First write their name on a piece of paper and your name on the other side. Then wrap the paper around a stick of cinnamon, with your name facing outwards, and tie it with two ribbons—pink (for love) and red (for power). A photograph of the person you want or a lock of their hair can also be added to the bundle.

Now place all of this in a jar of honey (because honey is sweet and sticky and you want your lover sweet on you and stuck to you) and wrap it in white linen tied with another red ribbon. Put this in the highest place in your house (the attic is best, but tucked away in an airing cupboard is also fine)—just make sure the person you want never finds it!

To empower this charm, you should also make an offering and an appeal to the Voodoo spirit of love (whose name is Erzuli) by lighting a pink candle and placing a gift to the spirit in front of it. Fancy chocolates and champagne are particularly appropriate. When the candle burns down Erzuli has accepted your offering and will work her magic for you. Expect a new love to appear within seven days or your current lover to suddenly become more attentive!

I hope these tricks work for you and that you get the love you deserve. There's a whole lot more spells and charms like this, as well as advice on love and relationships, in my book Va-Va-Voodoo.